Then I missed my deadline for one post in my second month and decided I'd alternate between two posts and one post every month.
This worked for three more months, until life happened and I felt like crap about myself for two whole months, resulting in no posts.
"It's okay," I said to myself in August. "I'll just pretend that that was my summer break and keep up with the pattern like nothing happened. Of course, then came October, and I got inspired by something on Twitter, resulting in two posts instead of one, like the pattern had demanded.
At which point, I tried to return to the pattern, but then came January and I ended up with four posts (I think it was the air).
In February, I crashed and just put up one post.